Posts Tagged ‘queer rights’

June 1, Blogging for LGBT Families Day in the blogosphere. Swept up in the recent Prop 8 stir, I’ve not been feeling so hopeful and didn’t know what to write. So I figured, why not a good ole reflection on why it is that I write in the first place.

Truly, I write/blog for my son. This amazing boy. He’s soulful, playful, imaginative — really, his own person.


He’s also a purple-lover, a dress-wearer, and, in his own words, most proud to be “someone who breaks stereotypes.”

So I write for him for many reasons. But they are equally tied up in the fact that he’s growing up in a queer family. Not that that makes him who he is, but it shapes his day-to-day experiences.

There’s a deeper level to my commitment, though, to blogging for Q and blogging as a member of the LGBT community and a queer family. And it has to do with work that’s both for the community of humanity at large, but also the queer community. Because as embracing and wonderful and inclusive as this community is, there’s still room for growth. There’s room to elbow our boundaries and expand them a bit. My boy is at work on that, enrobed so often in pink, purple, and sparkles. He confounds even many queer folks that he encounters, and in so doing helps to make evident the ways that even within a community that fights for acceptance we can still take our own level of acceptance a step further.

It’s for that expansion, for the larger embracing of identity within our community, for young and old alike, that I really blog. Because I know that will make Q’s life, whatever path it should take, a whole lot more comfortable. And I know that the change and expansion of notions — around gender identity, youth identity, just basically what folks “should do” with their lives — will make life a whole lot better for a whole lot of folks. So that’s why I’m here. And I feel so thankful to be on this journey with so many others.

Thanks, once again, to Mombian for organizing this celebratory day.


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Trying to keep hope alive

Trying to keep hope alive

I’m trying, but it’s a hard day in the domain of queer rights. I told Q this evening that the judges in CA decided to keep gay marriage illegal. The look of sadness and anger on his face was heartbreaking. Tears were close to the surface. This boy understands. Not only does he understand what the ruling means, but he understands the implications for queer couples and families, for families like his. He told us that anyone should be able to marry who they want. And he was emphatic. And ultimately, I think it’s that simple. But that simplicity is hidden under an ugly tangle of hate, misunderstanding, history, and injustice. And it’s untangling that mess that still needs to happen.

Yes, I want the mess untangled so that other queer folks can get married — tomorrow, next month, next year. But more importantly, I want it untangled so that Q and his peers, when they grow up, see a wide horizon of possibilities. So that they know they lived through change and that change brought with it rights and choices — to marry who they want, to live how they want, to have whatever identity they choose.

Q chooses what identity he steps into on a daily basis. And he makes empowered choices. Little stands in the way of those choices, it seems. And I want him to walk into a future where little stands in the way of anyone’s choices, particularly when it comes to love and partnership and committing one’s love to another.

Q's anti-Prop 8 sign

Q's anti-Prop 8 sign

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